NOLA Mission

Pressin' on

2008-07-30T14:59:00.003-05:00

Oh man, so much has happened over the past few weeks, some of which I can't disclose here. But here goes. Chris and I both leave next Thursday, and I find myself thinking, where did this summer go? It seems like I am just getting settled here, and now I have to leave.

It has been challenging the past few weeks, to keep on loving these people. I realize that we are called to love every person we meet just as Jesus loves them - that we are called to literally exhibit Christ in our lives. What comes with comfort in a situation is the temptation to fall into apathy, and slack in loving. In the words of Relient k, "being apathetic is a pathetic way to be." I think that the solution for apathy lies in a clear vision. When we see Jesus for who He really is, and we see the situation we are in for what it really is, we have no choice but to go into battle and... love, as oxymoronic as that sounds. As it is written, "Where there is no vision, the people perish" (Proverbs 29:18a KJV)

So! In the next few weeks, I want to love these people like Jesus does, and just be available in every situation to be used for God's glory. I desire the same attitude as Paul, which led him to say, "But one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:13-14) I know I've failed so many times to love these people like I should... but that's what the whole "forgetting what is behind part" is for. I just have to trust that God would use me in everything that I do, think, and say. Lord Jesus, may you be glorified in these last few days here.

Oh, and a shout out to Harry and Shari, and Ian: thanks for the support check! You have no idea what beautiful timing that was.

Tonight

2008-07-16T16:28:00.001-05:00

Tonight Chris and I are running chapel service! He's leading worship and I'm bringing the word. Pray that God would use us for His glory, that He would show up in a mighty way!

One lightbulb from the Lamp

2008-07-14T21:49:00.004-05:00

Crazy things happening here. There is a lot of spiritual warfare going on... and it breaks my heart that not all who proclaim Christ's name live it out. That some who are supposedly good might be corrupt. It absolutely enrages me to the core to see people being taken advantage of. That's why I'm here, to help those who can't help themselves, and point them to Jesus.

A passage in Romans sticks out to me in this situation - Romans 12:9-21:

"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality."
"Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited."
"Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay,' says the Lord. On the contrary:
'If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.'
Do not be overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good."

Man this is a challenging verse - not in the theory, but in the application. In fact, most of the Bible is like that. Lord, help me to live this out, by your Holy Spirit.

A quick outburst of feeling

2008-07-12T23:13:00.004-05:00

God is so good! It is amazing how He continually provides for us with exactly what we need, at exactly the right time. I think I'm getting a little more than I bargained for in coming down here - but let's not be premature.

So I know that that's really vague, but I'll put up more as things progress... oh and Brit, here's your shout out. You're not too bad, sis. I'm tired, so more to come later. Peace.

Man your battle stations

2008-06-30T12:05:00.005-05:00

Disclaimer: this will be a long one.

It's been a crazy past week, and things are about to get a lot crazier. How true it is that "our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." (Ephesians 6:15) I have seen and fought in many battles of spiritual warfare in the past week and a half.

One example is Brian, a sweet middle-aged man who I have talked with and prayed with many times over the past few weeks. The first time I talked to him, he was so sad and depressed that he cried as he expressed his grief over his inability to kill himself. We prayed for healing for his mental illnesses, and also his Crohn's disease. We have talked and prayed together many times since this, and he has expressed his love for God to me. About a week ago, I saw him, and he was just overjoyed. His stomach had healed a good bit, and he had a part time job handing out fliers. I shared this joy with him. I noticed that he hadn't come in for a few nights, and when I saw him, I found out that he had spent his money getting drunk. This makes me just sick inside, because of the progress he had made just beforehand. God had answered his prayers in a mighty way, and then he shows contempt by wasting his provision on drunkenness. Please pray that God would show him how He desires a holy life out of him.

Another example of spiritual warfare occurred last Wednesday night. About 2 in the morning, Chris woke me up and told me we had to pray for a guy. I was half-asleep until the moment I saw this man's eyes (his name is Richard). He was shaking violently and speaking just crazy things - scary things. We prayed that God would heal him, and he told us that he had demons. I don't doubt that he had both demons and a mental handicap. So we prayed over him in the name of Jesus, that he would be healed and freed of his demons. He eventually stopped shaking and went to sleep.

Frustration

2008-06-24T14:10:00.003-05:00

Man, I'm so frustrated right now. There is a distinct difference between giving people what they need and giving people what they think they need. This one guy, Arther E., has been bugging me for the past two weeks now. He brought his clothes up and left them in the day room, expecting us to wash them. However, we don't wash other people's clothes for them, we only open our machines on Fridays for them to do it themselves.

And then, when his clothes were lost (or probably more likely, stolen), he got belligerent, blaming me for losing his stuff. He has taken pot shots at me for the last 2 weeks - usually in the form of cursing and demanding that I provide for his lost clothes and shoes.

Well, I just tried to help him out by giving him some shoes (we have a surplus of shoe donations), and then he got mad because he wanted white ones. Are you freaking kidding me?!? I'm trying to help this guy out, and nothing is good enough. I'm sick of it.

I'm sick of the type of people here (of which there are a good many) who expect us to basically babysit them. They are grown men and women, and unless they have a handicap, they need to start acting like grown adults. Which means being responsible for your own stuff, and not blaming your mistakes on a government conspiracy or lack of compassion for you.

Really, it's his attitude that angers me the most. He (and some others like him) act as if they deserve our servitude. Nothing is ever good enough, and he is grateful for nothing. It angers every part of my being.

I feel that my job here is not to provide for everyone's little individual needs, but to give them what they need to move out of this situation into something better - both physically and spiritually. Well this is basically just a rant... I'm sure I'll be able to look back on it more clearly later on.

A quick update

2008-06-24T12:03:00.005-05:00

Ok, so I haven't posted in a while, so here's a quick update. It has been a really busy last week and a half. We have had soooo many volunteers, it's been ridiculous. Yesterday, if we hadn't canceled one of the groups, we would have had up to 70 people here at one time. It would have been a zoo. You have to understand, we only have like 7 full time staff members, many of whom don't even deal with the volunteers. So things have definitely been crazy.

God is working here - I can see the change that He has made in many individuals' lives. A good example is a sweet woman named Dawn, who responded to an alter call last week to receive Christ. She has such a joyful spirit, despite being homeless. In fact 9 people responded to that alter call - a joy to see!

I'm beginning to see and understand more of what these homeless people need. So many times they get the same message about receiving Jesus as their Lord and Savior, which is great. However, I really believe that what the majority of these people need is a push towards maturity - on both a spiritual and a social scale. Spiritually, many of these people claim Jesus as their Savior... but then they go and have no reality of Him in their lives. Socially, these people need to mature to the point where they can contribute to society and strive for a better life.

Pastor Terry (the night chaplain) has already told Chris and I that he wants us to present a message at least once or twice while we are here. I look forward to speaking to these people about maturing in Christ, and how that translates to our physical lives.

"Here is a trustworthy saying" (1 Timothy 1:15a) - "And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone." (1 Thessalonians 5:14) This is what I am striving to do.

A return to sanity

2008-06-15T19:39:00.003-05:00

Man, it's been a crazy week. I don't even know where to begin. Chris and I have just been so busy with everything, although that really isn't an excuse for how I've lived this week. It amazes me that even in a situation where my job is to serve people and love them in Christ, that I could become complacent. Of course, the cause is letting my work become a distraction in the greater work that God is doing. Looking back on the week, I realize how much like Martha I have been, focusing on preparations when I should have just been sitting at Jesus' feet... and inviting others to join me (Luke 10:38-42).

The return to sanity is realizing what I am really here to do; what God has put me here for - that is to advance His kingdom through relationships, to bring both spiritual and physical healing through Christ. The last week I've been seeking to get away in the nighttime, when everyone comes in. This is completely the opposite of what I should be doing. Lord Jesus, forgive me! Equip me to do Your work, to engage in relationship with these people and just love them, like You do!

It is astounding how the Lord provides for all our needs, even in our disobedience. Last night He sent heavenly reinforcements of encouragement in the form of the Azusa Pacific group, who we (not so) randomly ran into last night. We talked, we laughed, we got dessert and saw a jazz band at preservation hall. It was great spending another evening with them.

Also, there has been another return to sanity this week, of sorts. I don't know what happened, but George has been a lot better this past week. I don't know what caused it... I just know that Chris and I need to keep praying that God would use Him to lead humbly and be gentle when one of the disciples messes up.

I can't imagine what this next week has in store for us. I know a lot of huge groups are coming in, so we will be as busy as ever. Yet, I know that no matter how busy I am, God calls that I spend all of myself for these people, not just enough until comfort runs out (Isaiah 58). He calls that I engage them in relationship - in love and deep compassion.

Lord, break my heart for the lost and poor once again.

The deep breath before the plunge

2008-06-09T17:49:00.002-05:00

Oh man, I'm feeling a deep need for quiet time with God... a "women's center" quiet time, alone with Him (meaning I have a building all to myself). It's gonna be big, I can feel the churning in my gut with what is about to be expelled. Oh man. I only wish I didn't have to wait.

Night 3

2008-06-05T16:28:00.005-05:00

Man, what a crazy night. It is so amazing how God provides everything we need at the right time appointed by Him. So, after the chapel service, I sat down to talk to some of the overnighters - just to hang out with them and try and show Christ's love to them. A man sitting two seats down started asking me what I was doing here. I tried to explain to him how I was interning here, but he kept saying something that I couldn't understand. He eventually just got belligerent and starting putting me down for "being born with a silver spoon in my mouth."

This event shook me greatly, and caused me to introspect every reason I was here and every method I was using to show Christ's love. I had a quiet time alone in the office of the women's center (before they got there), and just poured out myself before God. I was at the end of myself, so many of my attempts to relate to these people had failed so miserably, and I had become disdained and looked down upon. I just came to God admitting that I was at the end of myself, that I couldn't do this anymore on my own. I was completely broken before Him, feeling so useless and unable to help these people.

God is so good and so faithful to meet us where we are at, in every situation. God spoke to me directly through His word and the book that I am reading, The Making of a Man of God. The chapter I read last night was so amazing - it was as if it were written specifically for me; soley for this moment in time. Here are the main points, evidenced in the life of David (1 Samuel 29:1 - 30:10): 1. God is nearest to those who are broken in spirit, at the end of themselves, and are calling out to Him in surrender. 2. Any self-will will drive you to a desperate failure or compromise of your relationship with Christ. 3. God is abundantly merciful and present for strength, blessing, and victory the moment we call to Him.

An amazing transformation took place in that quiet time: I went from despair to delight, from anger to amazement, from grief to joy. Joy in the infinite blessings we have in Christ Jesus - in the strength and mercy that He lavishes on us when we just ask. My vision went from the despair of my circumstances to the delight of being in the presence of our Maker, and being hidden in the palm of His hand.

I can't say that I've figured everything out about ministering to these people. But I now know, more than ever, God's power behind me, how He is guiding my every step. He will not let me fall or stumble, "[He] broadens the path beneath me, so that my ankles do not turn." (Psalm 18: 36) "God has said, 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.' So [I] say with confidence, 'The Lord is my helper, I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?'" (Hebrews 13:5b-6) Yes Lord, blessed be Your name, You are worthy to be praised. Surely you are abundantly good to those who call out to you in the name of your Son.

I will post on my revised outlook later.

Day 3

2008-06-04T17:25:00.003-05:00

Today was my 3rd full day here. Compared to the last few days, I didn't really work that much. The AARP worker who worked the front desk for the day room was out today, so Chris and I had to work the desk from 8:30am to 4pm, checking people in. I felt bad for Chris because he was up there for most of the time - I was busy helping Brittany rearrange her office, which was fun. I also had to do an interview with a special agent doing a background check on me for my security clearance.

My sleep still has yet to catch up to me - I'm still really tired... yet for some reason I had a lot of trouble getting to sleep last night. I think I just am yet to get used to the conditions in the tent. Workwise, though, I'm starting to get into the swing of things here, as far as knowing what needs to be done and how to go about doing it.

When I was working the front desk for the day room, I ended up talking to a man named "Chuck" whose real African name I could not pronounce. He is from Nigeria, and he told me about how all he wanted to do was go back to see his family. I asked him if he was working to raise money for a plane ticket, but he said something that I couldn't understand... something about being afraid he'd get stuck working somewhere for too long. Anyways, he looked so unhappy, so... depressed. He even told me out of the blue about how unhappy he was. I wanted to talk to him more about it, but I had to go work the bag room. When I came back he was gone.

Please be praying for him - I really want to show Christ's love to him. His unhappiness pains me. The thought crossed my mind that this might be the man to whom I am to give the money to that Bob Fraser gave me. I will be praying about this. Well, that's enough for now; I'm going to go hang out with the overnighters who will be staying here. I'll update soon on what all these terms mean. Peace in Christ.